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Size comparison between a male and female Kodiak bear : interesting
Main Post: Size comparison between a male and female Kodiak bear : interesting
I know the saying "Comparison is the thief of joy". But how do I actually stop comparing myself ?
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Or at least rethink comparison and use it in a more healthy, happy, helpful way?
And not the compare yourself to those less fortunate thing. I am grateful I am fortunate to be better off than a lot of people. But those in worse circumstances are not the peers I am comparing myself to, they aren't my neighbors; nor are those I would like to emulate or am envy of. No one is jealous of those in worse circumstances than themselves. I don't see how that helps me. That might help me think things aren't so bad, but I don't see how that helps me stop envying those with seemingly better qualities and lives.
What actual steps can I take or mental behavior can I adopt? Hoping for more helpful advice beyond the "just stop doing it" without a "how"? Thanks.
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First off is the quote "You are comparing your behind-the-scenes to everyone else's highlight reel." People bring up this quote a lot in regards to social media, but it actually applies to every interaction you have ever had with anyone else in your entire life.
People don't tell you about all their little failures and they also don't often tell you about their deepest fears, regrets, insecurities, and so on. People will be eager to tell you when they got an awesome new job, they will be not so eager to talk about how they've sent out 100 applications and no responses. And even when they do, it will be at a moment of their choosing, and framed in a way that makes them look not so bad.
Thus, you actually aren't comparing your life to anyone else's. You are comparing your life to what people choose to share about theirs.
There is also the rather mathematical impossibility of winning a lot of these comparisons, especially when you focus on people who have it better than you. Jonny is better than you at math, Jimmy is taller than you, and Jenny is better than you at gym class. Even if you are actually much better than average in all these respects, even among your peers, that's not what you see when you compare--you just see all the ways people are better than you. So it's just lose, lose, lose, everywhere you look. And even when you are the best around instead of feeling good you just stop caring about that and focus your attention on something else where you're not.
Another thing to consider is that each person is different. Everybody is so different that it is rather insane to even compare two people and say one is better than the other. That guy who's better than you at French? Maybe his mom watched a lot of french movies and so has he. That guy who beats everyone in basketball--he goes right home and practices, watches basketball, and he's been playing since before you were in kindergarten. Did you do those things? No? Would you trade your life and past for one filled with playing basketball? No? Then why are you feeling so bad that he is better at basketball than you?
I find it is still hard to stop these comparative thoughts from cropping up, but you just have to know they are useless and dismiss them. Don't chastise yourself when you have these thoughts, they are natural. Focus on your own goals and your own life and go after what you want. Take care of the people you care abut. Stand up for what you believe in. Try to leave the world a better place than when you found it. Chase your dreams. That's all that matters. Be happy there are other people around you with good qualities, or people who are better than you at things you want to be the best at. Would you want to have your current level of skill and be the best in the world? No.
It is true that some people will have advantages you do not have. You and the prettiest girl in the school both want to become actresses. It's not going to be as easy for you. You want to start your own business. It's not going to be as easy for you as it will be for the trust fund kid whose dad has money and connections in the industry you want to be in. You want to go to Harvard. It's not going to be as easy for you than it is for the kids whose parents are alumni, and paid for tutoring and violin lessons and sent him to study abroad over summer while you worked a shitty job just to save up for tuition. Life is not fair. This will be shoved in your face over and over again. You can do everything right and still fail where another person could have done everything wrong and succeeded. You could eat healthy and exercise and be diagnosed with brain cancer at 19 while a 110 year old drinks and smokes every day.
You must seek out the good in your life, and the good you can do, and focus on it. You are never gonna be anybody else but you. Play the hand you were dealt as best as you can. If that means you have to go to extremes to live the life you want, then go to those extremes. Many of the people you envy have gone to those extremes already without showing it. You can either spend your life whining to yourself you weren't born a supermodel billionaire pro athelete supergenius ruling monarch, or you can do what actually matters to you.
Comparison is the thief of joy - don't miss out on your life worrying about what other people have
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Everyone compares themselves to others to some extent but when it plays on our thoughts frequently this can really impact on our wellbeing. The evidence on this has been around since the 1950s - people have always used their relative position against other people as a way of evaluating themselves. Its probably a natural part of the human experience, but problems arise when we’re constantly aware of what other people have and what we don’t have, leaving us dissatisfied with our lives.
The habits of being competitive and comparing ourselves may have built up over generations, so don’t beat yourself up for feeling this way. There isn’t a quick fix to it but there are a few things can help, the first being training your awareness. A little bit of practice every day makes a huge difference and we can use that training to be aware in the moment when that competitive energy is rising. In that moment, shining our awareness and giving that feeling our kindness while we breathe stops us from being swept away and breaks the link between feeling and acting.
The second way is to be grateful for what you have - keeping a log of three things every day of you’re grateful for is a great way to do this. These can be big things like your health, small things like your breakfast or neutral things like the feeling of your feet on the ground as you walk. Taking joy in the world around you is the formula for a happy life.
The last way is spending less time on the things that drive our competitive energy. That might be social media, certain TV programmes or it might be worth rethinking what you want from your career. If the alternative to eternally striving for success is a small, ordinary, happy life - whats wrong with that?
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How about comparing yourself with your former self? That discussion came up yesterday evening with a friend. While I agree comparing to others may be a a thief of joy, I feel like comparison with my former self is beneficial to me.
Louisville military checkpoint loot comparison b42 and b41
Main Post: Louisville military checkpoint loot comparison b42 and b41
unbiased comparison between Tantaly and LoveNestle?
Main Post: unbiased comparison between Tantaly and LoveNestle?
Will Ciri face a common foe? : thewitcher3
Main Post: Will Ciri face a common foe? : thewitcher3
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Main Post: Comparison: 063 Black & 587 Rustic Black
Comparison of PS Plus Extra catalog games from 2023 ...
Main Post: Comparison of PS Plus Extra catalog games from 2023 ...
comparison arle and mavuika
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this comparison will not be based on who has more dps or dpr, but rather on who will finish the enemy first, which if you will notice is not a given. we will use jstern's dps and dpr (i'm more zajef about mavuika not being able to do 106k melt, but in this case it doesn't matter)
we will use an additional data, that is the preparation, what is it? it is the beginning of the rotation calculating animations etc. (basically that's when the damage starts to happen) (included in the DPR)
data: arlecchino Dps 93k (first rotation) DPR 1,488,000 (16 sec) Preparation: 5 sec
Data:mavuika Dps 106k DPR 1,908,000 (18sec) Preparation in: 7/8 sec (this is because mavuika and citlali's animations are among the longest in the game, almost six more seconds if you add the E of xilonen)
Arle as we can see will start to do damage before mavuika, this gives an advantage both for anticipation and for short rotation. t, this advantage allows them to finish off enemy bosses that have HP between 1,200,000 (or lower) and 1,300,000 hp, while when we get close to 1,400,000 the times will be almost the same. But beyond these numbers mavuika will be able to finish everything in 18 seconds or less, until his dpr mavuika will always finish before arle
and what if we find a 2,000,000hp or 2,100,000hp boss?
in this case neither of them ends up in a rotation and they need more attacks. but here arle has an advantage. despite finishing the rotation at 1,400,000 damage, she can use her advantage, rotation management (very underrated), she will finish 2 seconds before mavuika finishes her first rotation, but she will only need a melt to finish the enemy, in 2/3 seconds she will just need to use a rosaria burst and a fare hit. in the melt the first hit of the second rotation can reach about 680k (from here arle will have a higher dps, the bol has grown bringing her dps from 93k to 111k)
even mavuika could just use xilonen to make a 160 point burst, the two second delay could make it end slightly later anyway. (then there's the fact that in arle's rotations it's easier to switch from one rotation to another)
(I'm not using the fact that arle can shorten the previous rotation, and the triple reaction)
instead on a 3,000,000 hp enemy?
in this case two rotations are needed, basically when two rotations are needed arle will always have the advantage, this is because her dps has increased to 110 DPS and she will have also increased her lead. I'll show you we have the first rotation (16 sec) arle will inflict its average of 1,488,000 to the enemy remains no 1,512,000. (here arle as seen before she finishes the rotation two seconds before mavuika)
now she goes for the second rotation (5 sec of preparation), in this case her dps has increased 111k, she will not need to complete the rotation, about 4 hits will be enough in a time of 3 seconds (of which two are melts that will be enough to finish the enemy in addition to the other hits that do not have elementary reaction)
mavuika first rotation (18 sec) the enemy remains with 1,092,000 hp mavuika starts the second rotation, (so 8 seconds of preparation) and here she starts to damage
Now let's take a hypothetical stopwatch Arle = 16 sec first rotation - (5 seconds preparation for second rotation)-21 sec arle starts his damage (4 hits 3/4 sec are enough)= Arle finishes in 24/25 seconds
Mavuika = 18 sec First rotation - (8 seconds preparation for second rotation) - 26 starts its damage, a burst and a Ca (2 sec should be enough (the initial ca lasts slightly longer, and after the burst it loses a second to wheelie with the bike)= 27/28 sec
arle ends about two seconds earlier. (I repeat without using the triple reaction or shortening the rotations)
basically then every enemy that requires a third rotation arle maintains the advantage as his dps goes up to 119k/120k with a dpr of 1,920,000 (16 sec) surpasses mavuika in both dps and dpr. in other occasions where instead in that Plane there are more waves the mechanics of the bol allows arle to always have an advantage as also said by zajef
take everything with a margin of error, in theory some damage could be higher (example arle could have more atk or critical damage, as Rosaria takes care of the rate). for other specific bosses and with shields it is more difficult, as mavuika she has the big damage on the burst, a shield could slow down the rotation and her little flexibility does not help her. arle can adapt with various teams
the teams arle: arle-citlali-rosaria-bennet (two five stars)
The teams mavuika: mavuika-citlali-xilolen-bennet (Three five stars)
personal opinions: it's much more like a head to head in the end, even if the arle team has a lower cost.
forgive me for various mistakes
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Yeah it's obvious to me that Arlecchino competes and will even clear faster than Mavuika in a lot of scenarios, she's not getting powercrept at all. People just see 100k+ DPS on a spreadsheet and yell about powercreep without analyzing the practical advantages/disadvantages both teams got. Mostly I expect Mavuika to be better against most bosses and Arlecchino to be better in multi-waves chambers.
A quick comparison between Tier 1, Tier 5 and Tier 10 ...
Main Post: A quick comparison between Tier 1, Tier 5 and Tier 10 ...